Words from the archives 12; Trap It

Don't think this one is actually that old. Though the idea has appeared before in a few other peices I'd started. The incicent I speak of has happeaend me to more than once in my adult life, and for that split second it's the worst feeling in the world. 

Trap it

I was walking home from work;

Tie and a shirt trousers and shoes.

Got to the cul de sac and

Some young boys were playing

football in the street;

full kit, replica tops, shirts,

socks and astro boots.

They must have been about 10.

I must have been about 30.

One of the kids has over hit the ball and

it's rolled over towards me.

I freeze.

I can feel my heart beat fast suddenly going up a gear

whilst time has slowed down.

Out of nowhere I can hear a crowd.

Some cockney sounding coach, red

faced bulging blood vessels in his neck, Chelsea

tattoos and a pink Ralph

spit coming out of his mouth is

screaming out at the top of his voice;

'KEEP IT SIMPLE KEEP IT SIMPLE!!'

I take a breath.

I tell msyelf;

'Don't try and be flash,'

'just trap it,'

'get it under control and'

'play it back.'

Just before the ball reaches my feet,

another voice, deep inside

the isolation unit of my mind jumps

up and screams out;

'THIS IS YOUR CHANCE'

'YOU'VE GOTTA TAKE IT!!'

Somere in-between thinking about

those two opposing views,

I've stuck my right leg out and

my right leg is confused,

unsure what to do.

The ball hits the outside of my

black leather lace up shoe,

taking all the power out and meekly

trickling behind me like water

drops dribbling out of a

tap in a drought, and

rolling into the road,

like my very own You've

Been Framed Video.

'Shit, I've fucked it' as I slap my forehead.

Just to rub salt into my wounds,

I look up, and the

kids in the replica kits are laughing, and

making wanker signs at me.

I put my hands up and say;

'Sorry boys, I just aint got it anymore.'

When I walked away,

feeling ashamed, I

realised I was speaking in clichés.

I never even had it in the first place