Down
in a minute
Often,
when I talk with my mates
I
find myself saying how things have changed,
how
we've all grown up etc, repeating
these cliches like controversial refereeing
decisions
on Match of the Day.
Yet,
day to day
I
still get the urge to tap people on the shoulder
and
look away.
I
still put my hand over my mouth and giggle when
I
hear silly genitalia names.
I
watch as much football as I ever did and
when
I'm back at home visiting my parents,
sat
in my old bedroom, and
Mum
calls me down for dinner I'm like
'ahhhh
MUM, I'LL BE DOWN IN A MINUTE!'
Recently
I was walking home from work;
Tie
and a shirt, trousers and shoes.
Some
young boys were playing
football
in the street;
full
kit, replica tops, shirts,
socks
and astro boots.
They
must have been about 10.
I
must have been about 30.
One
of the kids has over hit the ball and
it's
rolled over towards me and
I
freeze.
Time.
Has. Slowed. Down.
Out
of nowhere I can hear a crowd.
Some
cockney sounding coach,
all red
faced blood vessels nursting in his neck,
Chelsea
tattoos and a pink Ralph
spit
coming out of his mouth as he
screams
out;
'KEEP
IT SIMPLE KEEP IT SIMPLE!!'
I
take a breath.
I
tell msyelf;
'Don't
try and be flash,'
'just
trap it,'
'get
it under control and'
'play
it back.'
Just
before the ball reaches my feet,
another
voice, deep inside
the
isolation unit of my mind jumps
up
and screams out;
'THIS
IS YOUR CHANCE'
'YOU'VE
GOTTA TAKE IT!!'
Someone
in-between thinking about
those
two opposing views,
I've
stuck my right leg out and
my
right leg is confused,
unsure
what to do.
The
ball hits the outside of my
black
leather lace up shoe,
taking
all the power out and meekly
trickling
behind me like water
drops
dribbling out of a
tap
in a drought and
rolling
into the road,
like
my very own You've
Been
Framed Video.
'Shit,
I've fucked it' as
I
slap my forehead.
Just
to rub salt into my wounds,
I
look up,
and
the kids in the replica kits are laughing,
wolf whistling and
making wanker signs at me.
I
put my hands up and say;
'I'm
sorry, I just aint got it anymore.'
When
I walked away,
feeling
ashamed, I stopped and realized,
I
never even had it in the first place.
It's
just a saying,
that's
too easy to say and
I
say it to much,
like
'things have changed.'
when
really,
they
aint.
Some
have,
but
somethings,
are
most definitely,
the
same.
