Wednesday 2 November 2016

So the Prince of Penge himself, Peter Hayhoe and his Muddy Feet film crew dropped a new video yesterday of me doing the Lost Days Lost poem. It was filmed back last December for the BoxedIn Christmas special, it was a mental night. I got very drunk, I was on stage quite early on but most likley well on my way to Lager oblivion by that point. Probably why I look so mash-up in the You Tube thumbnail, fitting, being that the subject of the story is about getting cained with my mates back in the day. Don't normally get that smashed but it was Christmas so I was getting into the spirit of things. Well, the spirit being an excuse to just get smashed, smashed under the banner of Christmas Spirit, sounds like something from the Soviet-era eh. Anyway, enjoy. If you lke, be sure to check the Muddy Feet page, they've been banging out all the these poetry videos every tuesday and there's some real crackers on there. Also check out BoxedIn, they run a regualr free open mike at the Boxpark in Shorditch and have another Christmas special  where the hosts themselvs are gonna step up for feature slots and they're very good.Get involved mate.

Thursday 27 October 2016

Appearence on Croydon Radio 23.10.16

Last Sunday I was back on the airwaves with those nice people at Poets Anonymous for their Croydon Radio Show, in the new surroundings of Airport House on the Purley Way, London's original airport. I always have a good laugh when I'm on there, big up Ted and Peter. Guesting on the show with me was Polish Poet Gregory Spis. Have a listen and download the full show HERE;
 

Gregory Spis and me in the Croydon Radio studio

Gregory Spis reading his poems on the air



Monday 17 October 2016

Sunday 9 October 2016

Roll The Bass: A Walking audio tour

Back in October last year, an app company called Voice Map approached me about creating a walking audio tour in London. I said yes. They make walking audio tours in cities all around the world. It's very smart, all you need do is download the app, then pick your story,downlaod the audio then plug in your headphones and go and take the tour.

Almost 1 year later, here it is: Roll The Bass a part story / part walking tour around central London which tells about the time I first visited the legendary End nightclub, off Totenham Court Rd, whilst taking in some of the old venues and other places of significance. It features tracks produced by my brother Will.Scott Cree

One of the reasons I wrote it was, well, one I was asked to, but two, it bothers me that in London, the home of Jungle and Drum and Bass, there is next to nothing to mark this. This music has spread globally and there are scenes all over the world, yet, walk around Lonodn and you would never know. Guess it's not the Shakespere or lawn tennis. It's a shame, as it seems to be coupled with the loss of so many venues and record shops, most recently of course, being Fabric. The End was a banging club, special to me and many others. I don't get out to many clubs these days but doing this again has got me back enjoying all that again, have even MCed a couple of times since,

It was a big challenge writing this tour, as I had to plan out the walk, calculate the route and the steps, walk it several times and for each chapter I had word limits based on steps which I had to stick to and it wasn't easy, also having to direct people and making sure those directions were clear. There was a lot of going back and forth, and then re-writing and re-recording but at long last, here it is. It's £4.99, get involved, have a listen to a story and you may even learn a thing or two. Nice one

 

Sunday 2 October 2016

Count Up To Edinburgh #9 Mission Complete

During the Edinburgh festival, if someone were to circulate a false rumour that so and so big bollox TV executive / stage producer was holding open auditions a mile out into the shark and sewage infested sea, beyond Leith docks, a hyper-enthusiastic undulating throng of merry actors, comedians, poets, magicians, clowns, knife-throwers and jugglers would saunter en-masse (armed with flyers), down to the murky waters only to perish to certain death; disappearing in floating pools of blood and sludge and flyers with review quotes stapled to them. For years after, passers by along Leith Port would hear distant murmurs of 'free comedy' and '4 star review' haunting the docks. Let's have it right, I'd probably be one of them mugs, though I'm sure I would have got half way there, seen all the people heading in the same direction, cussed them off for being more organised than  me and then abandoned all hope and sulked off to one of them late night takeaways that sell chips in curry sauce; either that or I'd turn up on the wrong day or something. In short. Edinburgh is like an extreme form of Monopoly, only difference is, it can seem, depending on what kind of day you've had, that everyone starts off with more dough and know-how than you.

Mate. Edinburgh was nuts. I knew it would be nuts. Knowing it would be nuts didn't make it any less nuts, it was still nuts. But all in all, a good nuts. To do it, and to want to do it, then want to go back and do it again, you do have to be at least slightly nuts. It just helps (a lot) if you've got the sort of dough behind you that would see you drinking in the sort of pubs that sell 10 different varieties of flavoured nuts (which come in jam jars) as a poncy alternative to crisps (which in itself is nuts because crisps are banging, all crisps, even Space Invaders.)

I pretty much had 3 objectives going up there, well, 4 actually.

1: To book, organise and get a show up there then put it on every day. (This stuff does not come easy to me)

2: Get my face in front of some new people, outside of London and from hopefully as many different places as possible (though half of the people at the Fringe are probably from London)

3: Get a couple of reviews.

4: Have a laugh (though this one was more of a given)

I'm happy to say that I achieved all of those objectives. The outcomes could have been better but also could have been a lot of worse. Could of improved in all of those above areas, particularly in my preparation; prior to this I'd never sent out a press release before let alone written one. Probably could have used my time up there more efficiently as well, flyering other events etc but all in all, I was pleased.


Me at the Pilgrim. That curtain behind me was at times the only thing between me and a bar full of noisy boozers. My audience was in front of me, presumably all looking at my Millwall tie thinking 'I swear that was from the 96-97 season range, great year for the club shop that was."


This was taken form the last show which to my surprise was packed. Dominic Berry took this, one of the many people who I met up there who I really enjoyed spending time with. There was a lady just out of shot, who just before the show started whacked my arse while I was bending over setting up. I told her it wasn't that sort of show.

The first week was very up and down and despite having a good audience for my first 2 shows it really dropped off and I was struggling a bit. Walking around the city, already sodden and cold, seeing all the massive hoardings and billboards advertising really banal looking shows, most of which had some quirky face on, with each one seemingly telling me, 'you can't afford this, go home, you small time mug.' Sounds a bit melodramatic but at times that's how I felt. Some of these people that take shows up there, must be able to write off £10K or some other ludicrous amount and it not be a problem. For many people though,  it must break the bank. Everything up there costs and it's very difficult if you don't have a lot of money. High venue costs. High accommodation costs. Massive billboard posters. PR Companies. It's a lot. Thank God then for The Free Fringe and the ethos with which is stands for, which meant I didn't pay for hiring the venue I performed in, which is a massive cost. Simple really. We don't pay to hire the venue, audience don't pay to come in, venue takes the bar. It can work. The Pilgrim, where I was based, did really well, smashing all their targets. All in all I spent about £1500 squid, not even a fraction of what some of these shows must have cost. It also helped that all the other guys in my venue we're really helpful and pitched in with flyering, and regular pick-me-up support etc. Made The Pilgrim a decent place to work at. Large up Soundman Davey Jones, Gecko (best flyer-er in the game mate!) Jake Wildhall, Joel Autterson and all the Boomerang Club crew, Harry Baker and Chris, Robert Garnham, Dave and Byron and of course all of the Pilgrim staff who were all really supportive.

The Pilgrim Boys: L-R Joel, Harry, Gecko, Jake. At back, Harry and me outside The Pilgrim Bar, Edinburgh
Second week picked up and I got a lot better at flyering and generally pulling people in etc. All the additional gigs helped too, Boomerang, Stand Up and Slam, Raise The Bar, Prepare To Fail, all of which helped. Felt like I got a into a good swing with it and the audiences were good to, generally really responsive. My mate Gary From Leeds said to me before we went up that things would start slow then pick up, and he was right. He was right about most things up there, though I did manage to persuade him that chips in curry sauce was better than chips in gravy, eventually he came round. Had a reviewer come in from Broadway Baby who gave me a decent 4 star review which I was chuffed about. Have a butchers here

Also somewhere in the second week I had a nice chat about it all with Paul McMenemy from Lunar Poetry. As always, I talked to much. I'd just done a show so my voice was a bit raspy. It was fun though. Have a listen HERE

The last week was wicked. Audicnes were good and I felt like I knew what I was doing by this point. There was bit of a dip on one or two days but from what I'd heard this was felt throughout the festival. Couple of people said to me that in general numbers were down on previous years, something to do with The Olympics or Great British Bake Off or some other nonsense. I really enjoyed the chats I got to have most days, out and about on the streets, with other performers, punters etc. Big up Bob Walshy Walsh, who I had a good chinwag with most days about all things football and South London. When out flyering, it's a bit like a melty version of The Wire, on the street, all hand signals and that, comminicating to the other flyerers, working out the punters movements and who's likley to want to take a flyer. It was thoughts like that which kept me amused on the slow days. But yea, in the end it all went well. The last show was by far the biggest and most generous audience I'd had and it was great to go out on a banger. Had another decent review from a young reviewer too by the name of Ben Huxley, have a butcher's here (though both Dominic Berry and I had a bit of giggle about the unlikely comparison.) Though I got to perform to many people, I was chuffed that on most days there was someone I knew in the audaince, a lot who took me by surprise. I had a lot of freinds and family who came all the way up. Conrad, Fez and Junior came twice! Mum, Dad and Nat flew up just for the day. Met some really great people to, some who also came twice, like this really nice family from Cambridge, two of which were teachers. Had a lot of teachers. Big up Riko and family too. Thankyou, all of you, even the one or two rude ones who did'nt pay any attention and were talking or playing on their phones thoughout. Don't undertsand why you do that when you can just get up leave, it's Free Fringe innit, but still, you interest and annoy me in equal measure.

Special mention must go to all the residents of Poetry House. My flatmates for the duration of the festival. Had a great time staying with these guys, all the nonsense chats in the kitchen and the many pick-me-ups along the way. Fay Roberts (got to do the best / worst / weirdest gig with Fay), Dominic Berry,(ahhhhhhhhhhh football-style audaince support) Alexander Rhodes, Hannah Chutzpah all the various poets and mates of mates who came up and stayed, and of course my roomate, Gary From Leeds. Legend mate. Helped me all the way back from last year, to get my arse up there and pull it off. In that tiny cabin room that stank of damp towles, we had a good laugh, through the good times and the bad. Highlight of the Fringe for me was when Gary rescused a component from my beard trimmer from off of the roof, using gaffter tape, a brolly, a broom and sheer MacGyver like skills.

So yea, all in all, I had a wonderful time, high and lows, old friends, euphoira and sadness, new friends and a lot of laughs. Would I do it all again? Probably. Yes. Dunno...ask me in 6 months mate.

Monday 12 September 2016

Paper Tiger Poetry This Friday, 16th at Teahouse Vauxhall

Yeas mate. Got some new shorter poems I've been working on. It's been a while, what with working on the longer shows etc. This Friday I'm gonna drop a few of them at Paper Tiger Poetry, at the Tea House Theatre in Vauxhall. this gig will be like going back to 2007 for me mate. Banging out the short sets. That's a good thing. I've not been to this gig before so I'm excited. There's quite a few features on the bill including man like Jake Wild-Hall, who was one of the Pilgrim boys up in Edinburgh this summer, he's a top bloke, spent a lot of time with him up there. He was doing the Boomerang club show, they runs a regular gig out in Hammersmith, hold tight Joel. My mate Gary From Leeds says the venue is pretty banging, well not banging, he's northern, he'd say 'mint' or something, or 'summat' morelike. So what's not to like. And the very next morning, I've gotta get up at the crack to go and take part in one of these Tough Muddah events. Fuck knows why. I'm up for it though. All of it.Let's 'ave it.


Wednesday 7 September 2016

Creatine live at Sofar Sounds

Hello! So this is the first post up here since Edinburgh but it's not an Edinburgh post. That will come, soon, possibly this weekend. I'm still unwinding from all that....

Anyway. Back in July sometime, on a nice Sunday afternoon, I was getting ready to run through the material for the Edinburgh show when I got a call, from a mate, who's mate had rung him, as their mate had pulled out of a Sofar Sounds gig and they needed someone, within about 2 hours. I answered the call and bowled up to some warehououse in Manor House and did this gig. They filmed it. Here it is. Enjoy it. I did.

Saturday 30 July 2016

Count Up To Edinburgh #8 I can count the days on my right hand now

So in one weeks time I'll be up there. Bonkers mate! Been building up to this all year but it's now suddenly come round very fast. Bit of a cliche but it's true. Mind you, the last month has been mental, I've not had a great deal of time to think about it really. In the last two weeks I've finished my school job for the summer, finished a 2 month youth project with Lyrix Organix, called Kingston Roots and just completed a 2 week musical theatre residency at Stratford Theatre Royal with Conrad Murray. And oh yea, I've moved out of my house as well. Not the most ideal of preparation but I'm alright none the less. Could do with a fat kip though. You know, one of those massive 16 hour ones that proper recharge you, waking up in a light and airy room with cotton drape curatins gently flapping in the summer breeze, with a load of Andrex puppies rolling round in carzy roll. I'm rooming with Gary From Leeds up in Edinburgh, I might ask him if he wants to stand in for the Andrex Puppies.

Look at that mug with his Edinburgh show
 It dawned on me this morning whilst brushing my teeth that this is all now happening next week, it's actually happening. I'm about to go and do 25 shows plus extra gigs, as well as having to go out there and get the punters in every day, which in itself is quite daunting. Of course, I knew all of this when I signed up and I'm making it sound like I'm about to go to war or something. I'm going to do a show in a pub / bar..I like performing, why the worry? I don't have the answer to that question. My reactions are probably way over the top but it's still a big deal for me. I'm sure I'll look all at this in a few months time and laugh, whilst thinking what a nob. There's a whole bunch of people I know who are going up there and I'm sure it'l be a laugh. It'l no doubt be a slog at points but that's all part and parcel. No pain no gain and all that. By sticking the show on, I wanted to see if I could actually do it and I'm doing it. Putting my money where my mouth is. Not that I have much money, but my mouth is reasonably sised, so in case I grt a massive windfall, I'll be alright. Anyway, I wasn't doing anything else this summer, so why not?

What?! He's got his mug on the back as well?!

I had a day this week with director Stef O'Driscoll, who I worked with on A Tale From The Bedsit. Stef is now really making a name for herself out there, I think there's 3 shows in Edinburgh this year alone that she's directed, don't quote me on that, she might have been telling me about shows in devlopment. Either way, she's smashing it, so I was lucky to get a day with her. I like to think working with me back on the Bedsit show launched into her new found director stardom, but I can't say that's true, though we did drink a lot of tea and had a good laugh whilst making it, so it was great to get back in the room with her again. She helped me tighten up all the pieces and add what I hope are now the finishing touches. I just have to record one more piece of audio then the thing there is done. I've also managed to recruit a tech to do my sound this week as well, seems like a cool guy and I hope we work well together.  I hope he doesn't like lager as much as I do, then we might have a problem.


So yes, I am now days away from starting. Gonna do a few more of these blogs whilst I'm up there. But if you are up there, I'm at the Pilgrim, everyday except the 16th, 4:15. Just look at the flyer, it's all on there. By the way, flyers are great aren't they.. They were designed by Natlie Clay check her stuff out www.styloclay.com. Peas and taters

Sunday 10 July 2016

Count Up To Edinburgh #7 It's getting closer...

Yea, not long now. So this last two weeks I've had some sort of headcold / flu / hay fever / avian influenza which has limited my output a bit. Really annoying, can't seem to shake it either, but I'm treating it like an Edinburgh lurgy preview as it's likely I'll get run down up there, they say most people do. The early performances have been improving, my knowledge of paracetamol based products is now a lot better than it was.

Speaking of previews, was in Guilford this Monday just gone for Keystone Poetry. It's a regular Poetry night run by Donnal Depmsey and the now Janice Dempsey. (They've very recently got married are now officially the Jay-Z and Beyonce of the poetry game.) Back in January they offered me the chance to do a preview of C/D Borderline. They rreally are lovly people and have always been supportive of me All in all, it went really well and was a good test of the material. I couldn't get any of the audio to work so all I had was the stories themselves, so I had to riff a bit between them but it was all ok. There's a nice review of it here


 As I've wrote in previous Edinburgh blogs, one of the aims of going up this year was seeing If I can actually pull it off, meaning organise what I need to do. This can be anything from sorting out a tech operator, to getting flyers designed and printed. So in these last few weeks I've managed to get a flyer designed (I used www.styloclay.com highly recommended!) and I've written a press release. Yea, a press release. Imagine that. Felt like a right nob writing it, it's worse than writing bio's, it's like I had to channel the inner-bellend within and become the worlds worst used car salesman, estate agent and investment banker all rolled into one, some proper mega-prick, all in the hope some journous might, just might come and review the show. Need  to check my soul into rehab after writing that. The alternative of course is to hire a PR firm but that's about £2000. You get the picture. As soon as I work out how to convert a PDF to JPEG then I'll stick the flyer up, maybe not the press release though yea.Hold tight Gary From Leeds (again) and Rosie Knight for helping me out though.

I've managed to sort my travel this weekend. Knew it was going to be expensive so I took the hit, weren't quite as bad as I was expecting tough but still a lot of dough. I'm gonna fly up there on the 5th (it was cheaper than the train, silly isn't it? Hold tight Jeremy Corbyn), which is nice as it's from Gatwick so I'll probably go back to the manor and see my parents before I go. Coming back on the 28th on the train with Gary From Leeds, who knows what state we'll be in. Either way, it's coming up fast now but I'm just about moving in the right direction. Lots more to do but I'm getting there...

Wednesday 22 June 2016

Nitrobeat Bites @Soho Theatre

So tomorrow night at Soho Theatre, as part of  NitroBEAT Bites a story I've written is being put into a short 10 minute theatre scratch and being directed by Benji Reid, who's a bit of a legend in the theatre game. It's pretty nuts, I once wrote a monolouge for a play many years ago, but apart from that, this is the first time something I've written is being staged, by someone else, and with some actors! Mate, but yea, should be a laugh though. There are 7 writers on the night whos work is being staged, including Amy Ng, Caleb Femi, Femi Martin, Segun Lee French, Titilola Dawudu. The evening is being hosted by comedian Athena Kuglenu and, yes and, there is a live DJ, Psykhomantus. Details on the flyer, still a few tickets left HERE


 












Saturday 18 June 2016

Some things I've been up to of late

1: I did a nice rap battle

 

Got asked to do this a few weeks back, what with the show, work and everything else I almost said no, but I rarely say no to anything, so I didn't say no, instead, I said, yes. 
Now, I'm a fan of battle rap, I've been watching it regularly since The Jump Off days of Professor Green and Stig Of The Dump and have followed that evolution of it into Don't Flop and all of the other leagues that have sprung up around it. I'm no stranger to rapping but battling? Mate. I'd be lying if I said I haven't ever thought about it and when they told me I'd be facing Bru-C in a compliments battle, I was a bit nervous to be honest, he's really good and I' seen him battle many times, as well as hearing a lot of his music, which is decent by the way. However, by the time I stepped up onto the stage, I'd gone from being very nervous to just wanting to do it. And I did it. And I'm glad I did it. I messed up my last round (which thankfully insn't on there above video) which I was annoyed about it but overall I was pleased with how it went. I'd go as far as to say I loved it. The event was great. All the battes were brilliant. It was packed, the crowd were really into it and I really enjoyed being on that stage, it was a different experience for me and one that I'll remember, I didn't sleep much that night and was still buzzing about it the next day.

Super last minute gig at BoxedIn

 

'Tis was the Tuesday before the big show at Roundhouse, myself and Talia Randal were due to lead a workshop in Surbiton as part of the Kingston Roots project, but alas, Talia was struck down with illness! Panicking we were, until out of the shadows and fresh off his Until You Hear That Bell tour stepped Sean Mahoney, who did a fantastic job, saving the day. By chance, Sean's regular gig as co-host of well known peotry night, BoxedIn, happened to be the same evening, and alas, their mighty headliner, Simon Mole had also been struck down with illness! So Sean offered me the chance to step in and do a slot straight after the workshop, "yes" I said, "we shall do this!" Ran we did, to Surbiton train station, to Waterloo, then down into the underground for The Waterloo and City Line (which neither me or Sean had ever been on?!), riding it over to Bank, where we seemed to get stuck behind a gate trying to get to the circle line. Bursting out of Liverpool St we then ran to Boxpark for Sean to immediately take the mike, sweating out of breath. 5Five minutes later I was on stage, I did my little bit and low and behold, it was filmed by these wonderful people called BlaSphMe TV. I had a great night, Talia and Simon made a full recovery, Sean is still hosting BoxedIn and as for the rest of the world, they all lived happily ever after. The End.

PBH Free Fringe Fundraiser


 This was last Wednesday. Really good night. The Bedford is a proper gig venue, old school, it has a green room with loads of graffiti all of over the walls from various bands, wicked. The bill was a mixture of poets, singers and comedians. They were all of a very good standard. I think these sorts of mixed bills are my favourite gigs and all of these people on the bill all seem to be out there and doing really well as the merch stall was packed with products. Don't often see a merch stall at the usal gigs I do.  I'd never seen Attila The Stockbroker before, he was great and lived up to the name. Was really impressed with Chris T-T too. He was something else.

Back in the booth

 

Been a while since I did anything like this. Wrote the bars on the spot. Was good fun though. Round Conrad Murray's studio again. Think I got shown up by the younger guys! Track line up:  Boss Man Bob, me, Killer Plo and Nahum. Beatbox by Nahum, produced by Conrad Murray.

Tuesday 7 June 2016

Count Up To Edinburgh #6 Hopefully they know what the name means now



Roundhouse Preview Yea, yea, it was sick, yea

Last Thursday I did the first preview for The C/D Borderline at The Roundhouse. You know what? It went really well. I was pretty chuffed on the whole. Yea there were bits that could have gone better, felt I rushed it a bit in places, I was having to mentally slow myself down (in fact it felt like the whole thing lasted about 5 minutes, but often that’s how the best ones go, it was a good 45). The audience were great, it was almost full (probably about 50 people in there) For some, that might be seem low but for me that’s flipping great, it was almost up to capacity and considering there was a massive event going on in the main space (the poetry slam final), Mark Grist and Tim Claire in the studio space, I felt I did really well. The space was perfect, small and cozy. I got in there around 4 in the afternoon and the tech, Tim, who I’ve worked with before was really good, had everything locked-down within about half an hour. I wish all shows went like this one. It’s given me lots to think about in regards to going up to Edinburgh, and, a bit of confidence. Let's see though..

Craft Beers, I’m just not convinced.

Though I never expect them to come, members of my family, some of my best mates and my girlfriend all turned up. They’re all very supportive and I count myself lucky, as they could well be sick of seeing me do this stuff, I imagine it can get pretty boring. As it is, they said they enjoyed it, which I was chuffed about. As it was, with the above attendees all in the venue, there was a lot of boozing involved afterward. Now, as anyone who knows me well, knows I do enjoy a good, crisp, fresh pint of premium lager, or 5. Recently, in the last few years anyway, a lot of these craft lagers now seem quite prominent in certain London boozers. I’m all for little independent businesses thriving and competing with these global giants but when it comes to these craft lagers, I’m yet to drink one that I actually like, and like, there everywhere now. Well, not everywhere, hold tight Ganleys in Morden, that's my spot. I dunno about these craft ones though, maybe they’re trying to hard to make them taste different, throwing all sorts of fruity concoctions together, but for a simpleton like me, it’s too much. Lager aint like ale. The difference between a good tasting one and a shit tasting one is both thin and simple. Roundhouse have that Camden Hell’s lager on tap, it seems to have done very well as is available all over the place. Either way, I had a quite a few of those despite me not really feeling it that much. But what I did feel, was a splitting headache the next day, like one of the worst headaches I’ve had in a long time,  like during my sleep someone slipped into my bedroom whilst I was spark-out and drilled inrto my brain, siphoning out all the fluid. It was like the Stella heaches I used to get before they weakened it a bit. Good night though.

Getting Closer to Edinburgh, In A Tight Situation Now..

 First preview done, Guilford next month but before all of that, there's tomorrow and THIS which will be supa-dupa: 
Look at all thoses names below all of which will all be at The Edinburgh Fringe this year. Gecko is the man who got me the gig, I'll be featuring in his show tomorrow night. Oddly enough we are both also in the same venue in Edinburgh, The Pilgrim. Small world eh. Reach, it's for a good cause and should be banaging!

Friday 27 May 2016

Count Up To Edinburgh #5 He thinks it's all sold out, it isnt

I'm using Sub-headings now

 Greetings. Friday. Bank holiday weekend. Half term. Hold tight all my freelancers though, I see you, all these aforementioned days mean nothing, other than more shoulders and elbows eating from the TK Max troff, I've been there. Solidarity.

Tickets


So, I get a couple of calls Sunday night from two people close to me saying they can't get tickets for The C/D Borderline and that it's sold out?! Sold out, I wasn't expecting that and although I was concerned about not being able to get people in,  I was also pretty chuffed. But the chuffed-ness (sounds like a negative word doesn't it? I dunno, like most things in my life, I made it up) was soon followed by paranoia, suspicion, pessimism and all the usual thoughts and feelings that loiter in my head, urninating on my neurons. I thought loads of tickets might have beeen given away or something, or it was a computer glitch, or it was a syndicate buying them all up like one of these Russian / Chinese conglomerates copping all the flats in London and leaving them empty, leaving me to perform to a room full of chairs (wouldn't be the first time). Anyway. It could be all of the above for all I know, I don't have a scooby-doo who's bought tickets, other than the people who've told me. Either way, I'm really pleased tickets have sold.Honestly. I'm pretty focused now on making this the best show I can.

Mug

Anyway, after all that, turns out it hasn't sold out after all, because one of my brothers belled me up on Wednesday saying he just bought a ticket and that it was no longer saying 'sold out' on the site, so I can only assume Roundhouse have released more tickets. As far as I know, it's pretty standard practise for venues to hold tickets back. Pretty funny though, thinking about it. Serves me right for getting excited about selling out. Bottom line is, there's still tickets and you can purchase them here HERE HERE AND HERE. 

Windows 10 would have grassed you up at school for smoking

Fuck off Windows 10. I learnt what personification meant recently. See the above title for an example. For months now I've had this little box that kept flashing up on the little netbook I'm using, asking if I want Windows 10, for free. Well, I ignored it, like one of them chuggers on the high street, trying to get my attention by calling me 'Fella' or 'geezer.' Then last week, whilst in the middle of working on another peice for the show, my computer just started wigging out, like proper going nuts, more than it normally does. The screen did something I'd not seen since the days of un-plugging the NES from the back of the telly. It kept on doing this and then eventually closed down Windows (in the middle of me writing my bloody piece) and spent the next half an hour re-booting. And it re-booted, yea, but it re-booted with Windows flipping 10. Faaack off Windows 10, I didn't ask for this???!!! It's like someone broke into my house during the night and replaced all my CD's with a years worth of Ok Magazine back issues. Long and short, I didn't loose anything, thank God. 

Need someone to voice a teacher? Ask your Nothern mate

 I keep tinkering with the middle and end bit of the show. I had Gary From Leeds over last week, he did a voiceover for me on a new bit that I added for the show. Thnk it should tie it all togethor. It's gonna come throughout the show, well, tjhat's the idea at the minute. Gary did a splendid job, his northern tones made up for Windows 10 breaking into my PC and shitting all over my files. I wrote about Gary on the last Edinburgh blog, have a butchers here

Paul, stop adding stuff to the show.

This is'nt really a new paragraph, just following on from the last bit on the last paragraph, that one above. Look, I've added some new bits to the show yea  and I now need to go and  learn them, before next week. I keep getting ideas for new stories and it's not really helping right now, what with the show date coming up on Thursday. It's fun though, too much fun  and I hope it will make it a better show, but I do need to go and learn all this bollox.

I've gotta go now

 and make myself some dinner. I'll be back soon for another update. As for this Sunday, 'eff all this show bollox, COME ON YOU LIONS!!!!!!! MILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL 

 



Wednesday 18 May 2016

Count Up To Edinburgh #4 House Swap with Gary From Leeds

And here we are. Wednesday afternoon, with a cup of tea, back arched over a small screen, waiting for this netbook to load up my blog editing page, with all the efficiency of a pissed-up piss head trying to get a door key out of his pocket without collapsing on the floor. All this show stuff, plus everything else life throws at me, is taking it's toll at the moment, however,  I had a fairly good kip last night, which seems to have temporarily addressed the balance. All good training for Edinburgh I guess. Needless to say, I'm pretty knackered but good nonetheless...

Speaking of training, since I decided, back last summer now, that I wanted to come up to Edinburgh with The C/D Borderline, I've been getting a lot of help from a good few people, but in particular Gary From Leeds, who this year is doing his new show Garibaldi. Despite having performed at the  Edinburgh Fringe a few times over the years, I still feel like I'm really inexperienced, especially in taking a solo show and doing a full 3 week run with it. Gary's been a great help, with bit's of advice, doing scratches together, sorting me out a brilliant and accommodating photographer in Susannah Ireland and more recently, giving up his living room up in Wood Green so I could run through all my shit, in front of a few of his friends. In return, Gary came to Morden, in my living room and did the same. Gary provided water melon. I provided crisps and pizza. Less is more.

Gary From Leeds in Garibaldi. Photo by Susannah Ireland


I could run this flippin' show several times on my todd, up in my bedroom,  pretending that I'm smashing it to a packed audience, all to little avail, other than learning the words, but just running through the show twice, with a few trusted people in front of me was worth a hundred solo bedroom performances. Since the Wood Green and Morden runthrough's (aka the home and away legs) I've been able to make some changes and additions to the show which I think improves the whole thing. Having done quite a few public scratch performance for the Bedsit show, where the audience are encouraged to give feedback, often on written forms, I think they feel pressured to say something about what they've seen, or suggest things, where there might not be anything much to say, so inevitably a lot of it it is just bollox. I much prefer this model of having a small invited audience, just to listen to what I've got and maybe offer a few thoughts. Really, I just want see if the thing is shit or not and if the material works in front of real people. That's it really. Gary provided me with that. All hail Gary, he's from Leeds.

I've known Gary From Leeds for a few years now, first met him when we were supporting Richard Purnel with his Boobs, Work and Me show. This is his 4th Edinburgh show I believe and from what I've seen of Garibaldi so far, it's the best yet, it's gonna be a banger. It's absurd, funny, intelligent and highly entertaining. Probably shit adjectives to describe a very good show. At the very least,  it's a call to arms for all Gary's around the UK to rise up ad support the cause of Gary. We all need a Gary in our lives. Here's another one. Gary From Leeds. Bring him into yours.

You can check Gary's show dates HERE. He's gonna be doing Garibaldi in Manchester, Barnes (yes, Barnes, SW London, there's a fringe there apparently) as well as a few others. Well worth checking out.

Speaking of shows. I'm doing THE C/D BORDERLINE PREVIEW ON 2ND JUNE AT THE ROUNDHOUSE IN CAMDEN. In capitols because I need to sell some tickets. Tickets £7.50, starts at 7 p.m

Go on, buy a TICKET, or 20. Pic by Susannah Ireland

Wednesday 11 May 2016

Count Up To Edinburgh #3 The C/D Borderline Previews ahoy

So I should probably mention at this point, and should probably have mentioned it before this point, several times, that before I head up to Edinburgh I'm doing a few previews of the show. They are all listed on the side on that gigs panel, but you know, they're easy to miss and most people probably get a squillion invites to someones show or whatever on a daily basis, so it's easy to forget and lastly, I'd really like to have an audience so need to flog some tickets, so here I am, reminding / asking / advertising these here dates:



I get to return to the Roundhouse again, for the Last Word festival, 3rd year in a row so I must be doing something right? Anyway, even if you don't want to see mine there's loads, like properly LOADS of banging shows as part of this festival, it's like, a, massive erm, festival? Yea, a festival. There giving a platform to for people like me, big up.


Funny story about this one. Couple of weeks back I performed at a charity night for Lyrix Organix (which was banging by the way, check the photo's on the site) - there was a guy performing there called Gecko, who'd I heared of but not seen before. He was brilliant, great singer-songwriter, performer and story teller, really smashed it. Anyway, we got chatting and it turrns out, he's also taking a show to Edinburgh, and low and behold we're both in the same venue! (The Pilgrim, by the way). Imagine that?! He was a really safe guy, safe enough to get in touch and ask if I wanted to come and do a support slot at the above night for his PBH Free Fringe show, what a touch eh!? Geezer's got a blue tick on his name on Twitter as well, cerified bruv!There's 4 or 5 shows happening that night, Jack Rooke, Atillia The Stockbrocker and more, plus the Bedford is a sick venue, all free too. 


Anyone that knows the poetry scene in London will probabaly know Janice Windle and Donall Demspsey. Bonafied legends, they're like the Tovill and Dean of poetry. I've known them since I first started doing all this stuff, goingdown to Poetry Unplugged fo the open mike. Theve always been really supportive and have invited me down to their regular gig down in Guilford. I got to feature there last year and had a right laugh, if you're in that area, come down!  

So there you go, these are the pre-views. If you're able to come, please come and come with some freinds perhaps. I'll promise that I will do my best to put on  a good show, afterall, that's what I'm here to do, amougst other things. Here's the Roundhosue link again, just in case you feel the urge to book tickets and yet have read this far down and have forgot to.. LINK TO BUY TICKETS TO SEE THIS BANGING SHOW AT THE ROUNDHOUSE BY PAUL CREE CALLED THE C/D BORDERLINE SICK YEA SICK (THAT'S A LINE FORM THE SHOW)

Nice one, Paul 

Tuesday 10 May 2016

New video: Montage

Good / great / sad / shit afternoon. Back in Febuary (I think) I spent the afternoon at a studio over in Docklands filmng with the Muddy Feet crew. If you don't know, Muddy Feet is a new venture from Poet and The Prince of Penge himself, Peter Hayhoe. It's aim is to to make and produce spoken word video's. Simple, but not easy to do, but very easy to get wrong, trust me. So far, they've had two great video's uploaded and will bring out a new one every Tuesday. Today is tuesday, which means another video and this time it's my turn with a little poem called Montage. Have a butchers below and if you like what you see, subscibe to Muddy Feet and support what they're doing. I know they've got a whole bunch of these video's lined up for release over the next few months, including some of the biggest names in the game, as well a couple more from me at some point. Big up Pete, Evie Mahoney, Luke Farley and my good mate Steve Todd. I know they all worked they're arses off on this. Be sure to check them all out. Enjoy.

*MUGGY DISCLAIMER* The idea's behind this peice are based on a version of me in my early twenties, I've moved on since then, (I think, I hope,) both in age, circumstances and general life experiance. However, I still do refuse to wear shoes in place of trainers, watch football, smash lager etc etc

Sunday 1 May 2016

Count Up To Edinburgh: #2 First run through

Hello. Last blog I was a bit pissed off, it happens, it's life, we move on. Even if the moving bit is like Trains Planes and Automobiles, when the car being driven by Steve Martin and John Candy has blown up, but they are still able to drive the thing, all burnt out and just about running but moving none the less. Just did the first run through of all the material so far, with some of the music interludes I've made. It went ok. I'm excited, but also realise there's a lot of work to do. Am playing with a loop station for two of the stories, not 100% confident on it yet but we'll see if that's something I go on to eventually use.

As it stands, there are 8 stories with more to come. In each show there will probably be time for 5 or 6. What I'm aiming for, is to have a whole bunch of material that I'm able to chop and change for each show, depending on the vibe I get with the audience. Each story is written to stand alone but together they all form this wider narrative. When I was a nipper, my big sister had all these Duran Duran 7 inch singles, if you layed them all out together they made this bigger picture, which was also the artwork on the album sleeve, I always liked that idea. So that's what I'm playing with. I'm using the stories form The 90 Sick E.P which are well tested and a few of the others I've preformed at various open mikes and scratch events, so material wise I think I'm in a good place. Just got to learn it all now and work out what I'm doing with each one physically, I have a few ideas..

Putting it altogether was fun though. Whilst doing it, I suddenly felt that pressure to select the right story when the music interludes were playing, it was an odd pressure, the type of which I hadn't felt for a while. Reminded me of MCing in clubs all thoses years ago, anticipating a drop on a tune about to kick in, and I had to quickly work out what lyrics I would use. This is uncharted territory for me, with other shows and spoken word gigs everything is usually pre-planned so I'm a little nervous in that respect, being that it's larlgy unplanned, well sort of anyway.

Gonna have another pop at it today so we'll see how it goes. Enjoy the sunshine

Thursday 28 April 2016

Count up to Edinburgh #1 Doing my own head in

Fuck sake. As much as I often talk about how much I enjoy the solitude of writing and all the other stuff that goes with it, in any given week (often daily in fact) there is without fail several moments where I want to rip off my own head and drop kick it over the garden fence and off into the distance, hoping that it lands in a Biffa Bin somewhere and some kind of salvage hunter finds it and turns it into something actually useful, like a car battery.

So I'm going up to Edinburgh in August for the Fringe festival with this new show called The C/D Borderline. Let's have it right, I'm glad I'm going, I want to go and this time I'm doing it off my own back, partly to see if I can actually do it, as in get the thing up there and pull it off, what with all the stuff that's involved with putting on and promoting a show. It's a lot, it really is, especially for someone like me who really does lack those essential organisational, admin and marketing skills. I'm not worried about getting the punters in (well not at this stage), I have zero expectation on that front, I just want to go up there and put on a good show, with good material and if that's to a handful of people everyday I'm cool with that.

The show itself draws on a lot of my experiences from school, how difficult I found it and how I've struggled as an adult more or less ever since. Those same traits that saw me bunking off, dicking about in class, struggling to understand what the fuck was going on when I actually was trying, mentally withdrawing from whole entire lessons, sitting down at home to do homework but just staring at it on the table to numb to even lift a pen, are all coming to the fore with a vengance in the run up to this. It's like diamond hunters siffing through the mud, except they're not looking for them precsious shiney things, instead it's something shit like, I dunno, used scratch cards or something. I'm probably juggling to many balls at once, as I have a few other projects on the go plus a regular job Mon-Fri. It's a bit nuts but it's always been like this with me and most people I know are in the same boat, a lot of these have children too and that's a whole another level so what am I getting so wound up about?!

I can look at it and see how ridiculous it all is and often I can laugh about it, as you'll hopefully hear in the show, but it's just when I'm at home,on my todd, with a ton of things to do, I'm sat at my desk and suddenly I freeze. My normally hyper active mind just goes blank like someones pulled the ariel out of the telly and before I know it, I've loaded up yet another grime video or a Fire In The Booth freestyle that I've probably seen a hundred times, or I start working on something totally new which has nothing to do with what I'm supposed to be doing. But even when I am concentrating, I just seem to fuck up really important things. Twice in the last month I've had to reply to emails regarding the show, one of which if I hadn't there would be no show, so I spent ages on them; making sure there was no mistakes, re-read them a hundred times, sent them and then bosh!: Surprise-faackin'-surprise I've missed off a vital piece of information on both emails that almost fucked up the whole operation! And I'm left, as ever, embarrassed, humiliated and really fuckin' annoyed with myself. But what's worse, is that someone else at the other end is affected and could quite understandably now think I'm an idiot, well meaning, but an idiot none the less. This has happened before...

No idea what the neighbours must think, what the with the random: FUCKKKK OFFFFFFFs most days as my computer freezes or my phone starts wigging out and I slam my fist down on the desk remembering that I've forgotten to do something, very important, again. The amount of times in the last month I've visualised myself going into Wolverine Berseker mode and smashing up everything around me, before ripping my clothes off and running into the woods to a live a feral life away from humanity, living off Squirrels and Parakeets (as long as I've got Mayonnaise, I'm fine.) Thankfully, I've not smashed anything up, it rarely gets to that stage but I've been close of late. In my school days I used to punch-up a lot of walls and I've put my fist through a few toilet doors (probably in the year 11 toilets in C block, few times I think, apologies) and I've probably damaged my right fist from doing that, which is very stupid considering I use that hand to write, type and grip microphones.

Anyway, this started off as a few lines just to vent a bit, but then I got the idea to make this into an Edinburgh blog, documenting the journey and that, so every cloud has a silver lining I guess. Even if no one reads it it's been kinda fun doing it and certainly better than putting my fist through a door. I also wanted to write about the other side of things a bit. As in the writing / performing stuff. Most of my online activity is either promoting gigs or talking about gigs I've just done and how great they were. To be honest, as cheesy or insincere as it all may seem, that is genuinly how I feel after most gigs, I like doing it. It's been a few years now (my entire adult life actually, plus a bit more, I'm 32) and I still very much enjoy it. But with the smooth of course comes the ruff, and sometimes it's a sheet of discarded sandpaper on the toilet floor when you've just clocked that there's no bog roll and the post man is ringing your doorbell with a recorded delivery of that car battery you so desperately need to get your muggy show to Edinburgh...

Peas and taters